I have two truly stunning surprises for you. The first is likely to be more unsettling than the second so prepare accordingly.
SURPRISE 1
There is no meaning to life. Perhaps you were hoping there would be to make sense of your time on this world. Like “Well, if I just sort of keep moving forward and doing stuff I’m sure at some point this will clearly have been worth it. Probably near the end. It’s just got to be that way.”
Sorry. Nope.
Odds are your reaction to this news is something like mine was. “¿¡Wha!? ¿¡What a fraking rip off?! Talk about the mother of all bait-and-switches... This universe is packed to the heavenly rafters with stuff that indicates a Greater Meaning. Alas, it’s like most modern story telling: all scenario and no dénouement. I’m out of here.”
¡WAIT! Before you head up to the nearest rooftop for your final fling with the thrill of life on Earth you have to read Surprise 2.
SURPRISE 2
At first blush this isn’t going to sound like Earth un-shattering news:
Your ¡FUTURISMOS! opened Season 6 with a 5-0 thrashing of Carmichael’s club—the so-called “We Are Awesome-O-5000’s.” Hitherto we’ve never opened a season with a win or had a winning record. That’s pretty satisfying in itself but here’s the glory radiating part.
Our current league has over 60 teams. We--your ¡FUTURISMOS!--are tied for first and show up fourth from the top thanks to our goal differential (which is second only to one team that won 6-0 and tied with two other teams). Marvel at its visual depiction:
A closer look at the teams at the top:
I concede it’s a small thing and deceptive for several reasons: it’s only 1 game; it was the Carmichael team’s first game ever; CSC doesn’t sort the standings by the talent divisions within the overarching league (there are A teams, B teams, etc all in one league). But in a world without meaning we have to rejoice whenever we find a glimmer of something greater no matter how small it appears.
Never mind that it’s nothing more than pyrite. Its gold-like glimmer will keep you entertained all the same on the way down.
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